is this resolution

I guess this is one of those days that reality has yet again, hit a spectacular home run.

Except this time it's much more real than the other times. It is also proof that time, in some cases, doesn't heal. How much time do we need anyway? Do we need some sort of resolution before we can allow time to do the rest?

It was never over for me, even if it means sweeping everything under the carpet and trying to smoke reality with a nice smile. It will always come back and bite you. Hard. When you least expect it.

Faced with the possibility of losing something so precious is probably one of the worst feelings in the world. The worst being you can do nothing much to salvage the situation, as it is already the most ideal situation in the scenario. Leaving you with the only thing you can do, which is to have that little bit of faith burning at the back of your heart, just burning bright enough yet not too huge to consume you.

Not too much as it might lead to disappointment at the end. Yet, when it is time to take a gamble, I have to. Clearly, I can only follow my heart, even if it means earth shattering devastation at the finish line or the losses along the way. This is what I want and at least there won't be regrets later.

I have to take that chance. Yet, what makes it so difficult now is being helpless. There is nothing much left that I can do except hope. I want to be there, but I can't. The distance is threatening to widen and it's so scary because one day, it might grow so wide there may be no hope for salvation. All these while I can only watch from the sidelines.

Everyone around me is urging me to take the easy way out and simply forget for the sake of myself. I can never really forget can I, given how things turned out. I figure they are not me, they don't know you and simply because they don't see you like the way I see you.